Topic: A Self Evident Truth. Our discussion continues.

Nicolas Copernicus:  "At rest, however, in the middle of everything is the sun."

Arthur C. Clarke:  "Every revolutionary idea seems to evoke three stages of reaction. They may be summed up by the phrases: 1- It's completely impossible. 2- It's possible, but it's not worth doing. 3- I said it was a good idea all along."

Nicolas Copernicus:  "Finally we shall place the Sun himself at the center of the Universe."

Phil:  "I'm not a gynecologist, but I would look into that."

Will Rogers:  "It isn't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so."

Phil:  "Intelligent life on Earth?  I don't know!"

Albert Einstein:  "If we knew what we were doing it wouldn't be called research, would it?"

Yogi Berra:  "You can observe a lot just by watching."

Dr. Carl Sagan: “Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.”

Mark Twain: “It is wiser to find out than to suppose”

Arthur C Clarke:  "Perhaps, as some wit remarked, the best proof that there is Intelligent Life in Outer Space is the fact it hasn't come here. Well, it can't hide forever - one day we will overhear it."

Phil:  "Honesty?  Tell me a secret you don't want me to know.  That's honesty!"

George Bernard Shaw:  "Ptolemy created a universe that lasted a thousand years. Copernicus created a universe that lasted four hundred years. Einstein has created a universe and I can't tell you how long it will last."

Phil:  "Free enterprise is genetically the closest to our hunter-gatherer roots than any other social experiment in cooperative human living. Build a better arrowhead, the world will beat a path to your cave.  It will get a little more complicated once civilization of our species begins.

Sigmund Freud:  "Zivilisation ist Verdrängung.  Gott verdammt es!"

Phil:  "Alright, alright!  Calm down!  Sex is important, Einstein, but you should have gone camping....alone....for several months.... without any groceries.... and cigars....to give it some perspective."

Ben Franklin:  "Hunger is the best pickle."

Charles Darwin:  At some future period, not very distant as measured by centuries, the civilized races of man will almost certainly exterminate, and replace the savage races throughout the world.

Phil:  Is the Cradle of Civilization civilized yet?

Phil:  "Double speak is to 1984 as polyverse is to______________?"

A.  The Voyage of the Beagle

B.  Mein Kampf

C.  The Trail of Tears

D.  Close Encounters of the Third Kind

E.  The Koran

Sgt. Pepper:  "Lucy in the skies with diamonds"

Jerry Falwell:  “Billy Graham is the chief servant of Satan in America.”

Sammy Sosa:  "Baseball has been good to me."

Declaration of Independence, July 4, 1776:  "When in the course of human events....."

Sigmund Freud: The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is "What does a woman want?"

Phil:  "A great orgasm, Einstein.  The purpose of the libido is the propagation of the species.  And by the current numbers on world population, that repression thing of yours has yet to commence."

Joe Montana:  "There's no thrill like throwing a touchdown pass."

The Idaho Couch Potato:  "This Spud's for you."

Bud Abbott:  "I don't know."

Phil:  "I've been to Helena and back!  You should see my car!"

Charles Foster Kane: "Yes. Dear Wheeler: you provide the prose poems. I'll provide the war."

Carrie Prejean:  "It's so embarrassing."

Alfred Hitchcock:  "Good Evening."

Maria:  "Fly me to The Moon."

Marilyn Monroe:  "Happy Birthday Mr. President."

Mick Jagger:  "I can't get no satisfaction."

Phil:  "I am not now, nor have I ever been a member of The Free Wankers Society.  The Free Wankers Society, bah!   What Free Wankers Society?  There is no Free Wankers Society."

Woody Allen:  "Don't knock it.  Its making love to somebody you really care about."

Dr Ruth:  "Remember to wear a condom."

Popeye:  "Shiver me timbers, Olive."

Phil:  "Maria?  Well....she's good, but she's no Maria. U? :)"

NASA's mission statement:  "Panspermia." 

Mick Jagger:  "You're So Vain."

Phil:  "Is that a Freudian slip or Victoria's Secret?"

Sigmund Freud:  "Man, ist wenn verliebt, sehr verrückt."

Leonard Bernstein:  "I feel pretty....."

Professor Henry Higgins:  "By George, I think she's got it!"

Clarke Gable:  "Frankly my dear I don't give a damn."

Bud Abbott:  "Oh, that's our short stop."

Phil:  "But love is real, symbolically speaking, Ann."

Rumi:  "There are a thousand ways to kneel and kiss the earth."

Brooke Medicine Eagle:  "Spirit of the Wind carry me.  Spirit of the Sky spread my wings and fly."

Emilia: "'Tis neither here nor there."

Marcellus:  "'Tis gone!"

Joe Namath:  "Hut one. Hut two. I want to kiss you."

Jim Morrison:  "Come on Baby light my fire!"

Pepe LePew:  "Je t'adore, mon cheri."

Jose Feliciano:  "Girl we couldn't get much higher."

Elton John:  "Like a Candle in the Wind"

Peter:  "Puff the magic dragon..."

Rif:  "When you're a jet..."

Friedrich Nietzsche:  "Also sprach Zarathustra"

Erin Pavlina:  "In summary, if you want to learn to astral project there’s no reason why you can’t.  But it will take a commitment and some high awareness."

Mitch Miller and the Gang:  "By the light of the Silvery Moon"

Dennis Connors:  “Design has taken the place of what sailing used to be.”

Phil:  "Ready about!  Hard alee!  Nice smile!"

Adam:  "Do you know the difference between a jib and a gybe?"

John Cameron Swayze:  "It takes a licking, and keeps on ticking!"

Bob Dylan:  "The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind."

Bob Denver: "Far out"

Maharishi Mahesh Yogi: "Yogic Flying"

Clarence Darrow: "Some of you say religion makes people happy. So does laughing gas."

Robin:  "Holy Smokes, Batman!"

Hopalong Cassidy:  "Some women folk have a way of changing a man's mind without him even knowin' it. Funny..."

King Kong:  "I have these feelings for you Ann, but I guess I'm having a hard time expressing them.  Please forgive me, I'm just a big ole dopey gorilla.  I've thought about therapy, William Jennings Bryan, Exxon, quantitative analysis.... I just don't know if it could ever work out between us."

Martin (The Geico Gecko):  "Oh dear!"

Our Continuing Discussion on Self Evidence Will Resume Tomorrow....

"Cavemen Today!"

Yogi Berra:  "It's déjà vu all over again."

A long, long time ago.....

Son: "I want fly"

Chief: "no good"

Son: "yes, bird"

Chief:  "huh?"

100,000 years later....

Son:  “I think it would be fun to be able to fly like a bird.”

Chief: “OK, but we’ll need to build a flying machine.”

Son: “That would be great!”

Chief: “But first we're gonna have to figure out how to cultivate and domesticate so we can stay put.

Son:  “Why do we have to stay put?”

Chief “’Cause we're gonna need to build a factory”.

Son:  “That would be fantastic!  I'm tired of wandering around looking for food all day long.  

Chief:  “Daughter, you know how these plants work don’t you?”

Daughter:  “I know a little magic.”

Son:  “What’s a factory?”

25,000 years later....

Chief:  I tired of all these other tribes stealing our crops and livestock. 

Son:  We need to build a fence.

Chief:  A  fence!  Great idea!  A strong fense!  And maybe some religion, too, now that we have this gardening  thing down.

Son:  Religion?

Chief:  Cooperation without having to explain all the magic that goes into our establishment! 

Son:  What about Universal Education?

Chief:  Huh?  This magic is what gives us the power, Son.  And it’s proprietary. 

Daughter:  Don’t I get some credit?

Chief:  SHH! 

Daughter:  “Cavemen!”

10,000 years later....

Son:  Where do we come from?

Chief:  That’s a good question?  You came from your mother.

Son:  Where did she come from?

Chief:  Her mother.

Son:  Where did the first mother come from?

Chief:  A fruit fell to the ground and the first mother sprang up.

Son:  Where did the first father come from?

Chief:  Another fruit fell to the ground and the first father sprang up.  Then they had a picnic. They ate some fruit, and some time later in the Spring out sprang the first off spring from the first mother.

Son:  Fruitful Spring!  How do you know this?

Chief:  Huh?  I figured it out.  Why, don’t you believe me?  Are you on this Universal Education thing again?

Son:  Your guess is as good as mine.

Chief:  Believe me!  It’s true!  Now you listen to me.

Son:  Where did everything come from?  A really big fruit?

Chief:  Yes, from a really big fruit tree.

Son:  So we’re all descendents of a really big family fruit tree.  Well, why didn’t you say so?

Chief:  Is that all?

Son:  Where did the really big family fruit tree come from?

Chief:  Now you listen to me!  If you look up into the night sky, every night you’ll see a fruit falling from the sky.  From the really big fruit tree.

Son:  You’ve got all the answers, don’t you?

Chief:  I better had, I’m the leader of this tribe. A lot of people are counting on me.  So you listen to me, you hear?

Son:  I think we need a university.

Chief:  Huh?  What’s a university?

Son:  But first we need to do some research.

Chief:  Where are you going? We already have a calendar shrine! We already know when to plant the seeds.

Son:  I gotta wander.  It’s in my genes.

Chief:  Be sure and write.

Son:  WHEN I FIGURE THAT OUT I WILL!

Chief:  WAIT!  I DON’T KNOW HOW TO READ!

Son:  WHO DOES?  FIGURE IT OUT!

Chief:  Great!  What is this world coming to? Reading and writing and ‘rithmetic.   My bankers already know ‘rithmetic.  Maybe they can help.  DON’T FORGET ABOUT YOUR ROYALTIES!  Kids these days.  DON’T YOU WANT TO SETTLE DOWN?  DON’T YOU WANT TO FLY LIKE A BIRD?  I thought everyone wanted to fly like the birds.  Maybe my bankers can help.  They already know about ‘rithmetic.  Wait a minute.  What’s he going to write on?  Rocks?  Wet clay tablets?  That might work.  Wet clay tablets baked in the sun.  Or in the fire.  Yeah. This establishment thing is starting to get complicated.

Banker:  You’re right.

Chief:  Yeah, but we don’t have a postal service.  Or even addresses.  OK.  We need addresses!  Write this down!

Banker:  Who, me?

Chief:  Take a memo!

Banker:  All I know is how to write down numbers.

Chief:  Well, think of something.  You’re the new tribal scribe!

Banker:  I am?

Chief:  I gave you a promotion! 

Banker:  I’m already the wealthiest caveman here.

Chief:  You are?  I thought I was!

Banker:  That’s what I meant!

Chief:  Are you sure?

Banker:  Yes!  I’ll be happy to be the new tribal scribe.  How about calling me the Banker Tribal Scribe.

Chief:  OK Banker Tribal Scribe.  Well, where’s your writing material?  You’re gone write this down with that little stick?

Banker:  Yes.  On this wet clay tablet. 

Chief:  “What is an address?  Suggestions welcomed.”  Got it?  Print that up and circulate it throughout the village.

Banker: I can’t write that yet, and nobody can read it anyway.

Chief:  Well,  let’s start a village school.  Get on that right now. 

Banker:  And invent written language too?

Chief:  What’s the matter? Create a code with symbols. We’ll call it “Tongue.” If you need some help, get some. And make it snappy!

Banker:  Who does he think I am, Bill Gates? And what about all those things that don't have a name that we just point to and say that? 

Chief:  Name them. 

Banker:  Name them all?  Oh! Now I'm a tonguologist! Tonguology.  This could be fun. 

Chief:  What's a motorcycle?

Coach:  I have a new game for the masses, Chief.

Chief:  What are masses?

Coach:  I have a new game for our tribe?

Chief:  OK, lets hear it.

Coach:  We create two teams of players, and they try to get the ball into the goal.

Chief:  What's a ball?

Coach:  It's like an egg, but round.

Chief:  OK.  So what?   That's it?  They steal an egg and put it in a nest?

Coach:  No, not exactly.  The ball is bigger and it's made from leather.

Chief:  You got a big egg.

Coach:  Well, the really fun part of this game is they can't use their hands.

Chief:  So how do they get the big egg into the big nest?

Coach:  They use their feet.

Chief:  So why can't they use their hands?

Coach:  I don't know, I just thought this game up. But they can use their heads.

Chief:  What do you mean?

Coach:  They can use their heads to maneuver the ball into the goal.  Bounce the ball off their heads!

Chief:  Won't they get egg all over their face?

Coach:  The ball is made of leather.  It only has air in it?

Chief:  Well, won't the air get all over their face?

Coach:  The ball won't break.

Chief:  Oh well that's good.  What's air?

Coach:  So can I organize this game?

Chief:  Well... all right.  But I think they should use their hands, and not their heads.  And maybe use some sticks.

Coach:  I really have to put my foot down. I think they should use their feet and their heads without their hands or sticks.

Chief:  I think you're nuts, but go ahead.  It will never catch on.  So what are the masses?  And what's this air?  And what exactly do you mean round?                               

Chief:  Put his foot down.  It's better to use their heads instead of their hands.  Cavemen today!

Some months later...

Chief:  How's your egg hunt?

Coach:  Some of them really like it, but others still want to use their hands.

Chief:  I knew that.  It will never catch on.

Coach:  I want to try another game.

Chief:  Well of course you do.  I told you.  So what is it?  Tell me!

Coach:  Well, the ball really is shaped like an egg.  And the center bends down, and on the "hut one, hut two" signal pops the ball to the quarterback through his legs, where the hands of the quarterback are waiting in his crotch. The quarterback ..

Chief:  Wait!  Wait!  Wait!  You've got the quarterback”s hands between the legs of the center whose ass in up in the air?

Coach:  That's right.

Chief:  Where exactly did you say?

Coach:  In the center's crotch.

Chief:  Hut One?  Hut Two?  What does that mean?

Coach:  I don't know, I'm just making this game up?  OK?

Chief:  Well OK?  But you really do sound screwy?

Coach:  WooHoo!  Wait till you see the tight ends!  And forward passes! Bye.

Chief:  I think that guy is off his rocker.  I wonder if he's gay?  It sounds like crap to me. Cavemen today! 

Our Continuing Discussion on Self Evidence Will Resume Tomorrow....

Today


"Cavemen Today!"

Yogi Berra:  "It's déjà vu all over again."

A long, long time ago.....

Son: "I want fly"

Chief: "no good"

Son: "yes, bird"

Chief:  "huh?"

100,000 years later....

Son:  “I think it would be fun to be able to fly like a bird.”

Chief: “OK, but we’ll need to build a flying machine.”

Son: “That would be great!”

Chief: “But first we're gonna have to figure out how to cultivate and domesticate so we can stay put.

Son:  “Why do we have to stay put?”

Chief “’Cause we're gonna need to build a factory”.

Son:  “That would be fantastic!  I'm tired of wandering around looking for food all day long.  

Chief:  “Daughter, you know how these plants work don’t you?”

Daughter:  “I know a little magic.”

Son:  “What’s a factory?”

25,000 years later....

Chief:  I tired of all these other tribes stealing our crops and livestock. 

Son:  We need to build a fence.

Chief:  A  fence!  Great idea!  A strong fense!  And maybe some religion, too, now that we have this gardening  thing down.

Son:  Religion?

Chief:  Cooperation without having to explain all the magic that goes into our establishment! 

Son:  What about Universal Education?

Chief:  Huh?  This magic is what gives us the power, Son.  And it’s proprietary. 

Daughter:  Don’t I get some credit?

Chief:  SHH! 

Daughter:  “Cavemen!”

10,000 years later....

Son:  Where do we come from?

Chief:  That’s a good question?  You came from your mother.

Son:  Where did she come from?

Chief:  Her mother.

Son:  Where did the first mother come from?

Chief:  A fruit fell to the ground and the first mother sprang up.

Son:  Where did the first father come from?

Chief:  Another fruit fell to the ground and the first father sprang up.  Then they had a picnic. They ate some fruit, and some time later in the Spring out sprang the first off spring from the first mother.

Son:  Fruitful Spring!  How do you know this?

Chief:  Huh?  I figured it out.  Why, don’t you believe me?  Are you on this Universal Education thing again?

Son:  Your guess is as good as mine.

Chief:  Believe me!  It’s true!  Now you listen to me.

Son:  Where did everything come from?  A really big fruit?

Chief:  Yes, from a really big fruit tree.

Son:  So we’re all descendents of a really big family fruit tree.  Well, why didn’t you say so?

Chief:  Is that all?

Son:  Where did the really big family fruit tree come from?

Chief:  Now you listen to me!  If you look up into the night sky, every night you’ll see a fruit falling from the sky.  From the really big fruit tree.

Son:  You’ve got all the answers, don’t you?

Chief:  I better had, I’m the leader of this tribe. A lot of people are counting on me.  So you listen to me, you hear?

Son:  I think we need a university.

Chief:  Huh?  What’s a university?

Son:  But first we need to do some research.

Chief:  Where are you going? We already have a calendar shrine! We already know when to plant the seeds.

Son:  I gotta wander.  It’s in my genes.

Chief:  Be sure and write.

Son:  WHEN I FIGURE THAT OUT I WILL!

Chief:  WAIT!  I DON’T KNOW HOW TO READ!

Son:  WHO DOES?  FIGURE IT OUT!

Chief:  Great!  What is this world coming to? Reading and writing and ‘rithmetic.   My bankers already know ‘rithmetic.  Maybe they can help.  DON’T FORGET ABOUT YOUR ROYALTIES!  Kids these days.  DON’T YOU WANT TO SETTLE DOWN?  DON’T YOU WANT TO FLY LIKE A BIRD?  I thought everyone wanted to fly like the birds.  Maybe my bankers can help.  They already know about ‘rithmetic.  Wait a minute.  What’s he going to write on?  Rocks?  Wet clay tablets?  That might work.  Wet clay tablets baked in the sun.  Or in the fire.  Yeah. This establishment thing is starting to get complicated.

Banker:  You’re right.

Chief:  Yeah, but we don’t have a postal service.  Or even addresses.  OK.  We need addresses!  Write this down!

Banker:  Who, me?

Chief:  Take a memo!

Banker:  All I know is how to write down numbers.

Chief:  Well, think of something.  You’re the new tribal scribe!

Banker:  I am?

Chief:  I gave you a promotion! 

Banker:  I’m already the wealthiest caveman here.

Chief:  You are?  I thought I was!

Banker:  That’s what I meant!

Chief:  Are you sure?

Banker:  Yes!  I’ll be happy to be the new tribal scribe.  How about calling me the Banker Tribal Scribe.

Chief:  OK Banker Tribal Scribe.  Well, where’s your writing material?  You’re gone write this down with that little stick?

Banker:  Yes.  On this wet clay tablet. 

Chief:  “What is an address?  Suggestions welcomed.”  Got it?  Print that up and circulate it throughout the village.

Banker: I can’t write that yet, and nobody can read it anyway.

Chief:  Well,  let’s start a village school.  Get on that right now. 

Banker:  And invent written language too?

Chief:  What’s the matter? Create a code with symbols. We’ll call it “Tongue.” If you need some help, get some. And make it snappy!

Banker:  Who does he think I am, Bill Gates? And what about all those things that don't have a name that we just point to and say that? 

Chief:  Name them. 

Banker:  Name them all?  Oh! Now I'm a tonguologist! Tonguology.  This could be fun. 

Chief:  What's a motorcycle?

Coach:  I have a new game for the masses, Chief.

Chief:  What are masses?

Coach:  I have a new game for our tribe?

Chief:  OK, lets hear it.

Coach:  We create two teams of players, and they try to get the ball into the goal.

Chief:  What's a ball?

Coach:  It's like an egg, but round.

Chief:  OK.  So what?   That's it?  They steal an egg and put it in a nest?

Coach:  No, not exactly.  The ball is bigger and it's made from leather.

Chief:  You got a big egg.

Coach:  Well, the really fun part of this game is they can't use their hands.

Chief:  So how do they get the big egg into the big nest?

Coach:  They use their feet.

Chief:  So why can't they use their hands?

Coach:  I don't know, I just thought this game up. But they can use their heads.

Chief:  What do you mean?

Coach:  They can use their heads to maneuver the ball into the goal.  Bounce the ball off their heads!

Chief:  Won't they get egg all over their face?

Coach:  The ball is made of leather.  It only has air in it?

Chief:  Well, won't the air get all over their face?

Coach:  The ball won't break.

Chief:  Oh well that's good.  What's air?

Coach:  So can I organize this game?

Chief:  Well... all right.  But I think they should use their hands, and not their heads.  And maybe use some sticks.

Coach:  I really have to put my foot down. I think they should use their feet and their heads without their hands or sticks.

Chief:  I think you're nuts, but go ahead.  It will never catch on.  So what are the masses?  And what's this air?  And what exactly do you mean round?                              

Chief:  Put his foot down.  It's better to use their heads instead of their hands.  Cavemen today!

Some months later...

Chief:  How's your egg hunt?

Coach:  Some of them really like it, but others still want to use their hands.

Chief:  I knew that.  It will never catch on.

Coach:  I want to try another game.

Chief:  Well of course you do.  I told you.  So what is it?  Tell me!

Coach:  Well, the ball really is shaped like an egg.  And the center bends down, and on the "hut one, hut two" signal pops the ball to the quarterback through his legs, where the hands of the quarterback are waiting in his crotch. The quarterback ..

Chief:  Wait!  Wait!  Wait!  You've got the quarterback”s hands between the legs of the center whose ass in up in the air?

Coach:  That's right.

Chief:  Where exactly did you say?

Coach:  In the center's crotch.

Chief:  Hut One?  Hut Two?  What does that mean?

Coach:  I don't know, I'm just making this game up?  OK?

Chief:  Well OK?  But you really do sound screwy?

Coach:  WooHoo!  Wait till you see the tight ends!  And forward passes! Bye.

Chief:  I think that guy is off his rocker.  I wonder if he's gay?  It sounds like crap to me. Cavemen today!