Topic: A Self Evident Truth

Phil:  "The energy crisis?  Hitler's revenge for North Africa!"

Cris Mathews:  "Bummer!"

Beach Boys:  "Hoist up your sails John B."

T. Boone Pickens:  "We’ve got all these politicians talking about better health care and what all, but believe me, we’re not going to have the money to take care of sick people.. or anyone else as far as I’m concerned.. if we don’t fix our energy problem right now. I’ve got an idea what to do. It might not be a perfect idea, but hell, none of my best ideas have been perfect."

Phil:  "Factor in the cost of two recent wars in the Middle East and the ongoing war on terrorism to the cost of a gallon of gasoline, what are we talking about $10? $20? a gallon without factoring in the cost of the wounded and the dead? Now if you factor in inflation since 1917, the costs of WWl, WWll, the Cold War.....well, you catch my drift."

Hypatia of Alexandria:  "Reserve your right to think, for even to think wrongly is better than not to think at all."

Phil:  "It might be more cost effective to open an escrow account at the UN and offer 'Wanted Dead or Alive: Osama Bin Laden.  Reward:  One Trillion US Dollars.'"

David Frum: "The axis of evil"

Howard Beale:  "They got him.  He's dead!"

Phil:  "Oh!"

Yeah man: "Yup!"

Mona Lisa: "Can you prove God exists?"

Leonardo Da Vinci:  "If I told you, you wouldn't believe me."

Mona Lisa:   "You know?"

Leonardo Da Vinci:  "You know!"

Mona Lisa: "I know?"

Leonardo Da Vinci: "That's right."

Mona Lisa: "How do you know?"

Leonardo Da Vinci: "That is correct."

Mona Lisa:  "Jackass."

Leonardo Da Vinci:  "Jackass?"

Mona Lisa:  "That's right!"

Leonardo Da Vinci:  "You know?"

Mona Lisa:  "I know."

Leonardo Da Vinci:  "How do you know?"

Mona Lisa:  ;)

Patsy Cline:  "I'm Crazy."

Alfred E Neuman:  "What?  Me worry?"

Mr. Ed:  "Wilbur."

Phil:  "Did you see the movie 'The Man Who Would Be King?  How about 'The Legend of Sleepy Hollow?' 'The Godfather?'"

Governor David Paterson:  "Did you see 'The Boys from Brazil?'"

Joe Cocker:  "I get by with a little help from my friends."

Ringo Starr:  "So this is America. They must be out of their minds."

Kenneth Starr:  “Let me share with you a bit of the record in the case.”

John Lennon:  "He blew his mind out in a car."

Lee Harvey Oswald:  "I'm a patsy."

LBJ:  “I never trust a man unless I've got his pecker in my pocket.”

Jack Ruby:  "I thought I'd be a hero."

Thomas Rudman-Brown:  "The best government is the one that charges you the least blackmail for leaving you alone.”

Glenn Beck:  "It's morning in America!"

Robin Williams:  "Good morning Viet Nam"

Paul Harvey:  "Good Day!"

Wilbur:  "Hello, Ed"

Louis Armstrong:  "Hello Dolly."

Martin Short:  "The Calla Lillies are in bloom today."

George Segal:  "What's going on?"

Yogi Berra:  "It's deja vu all over again."

Marvin Gaye:  "What going on?"

Joe Dirt: "Yeah, I'm cool."

Phil:  "Is the source of all religious fanaticism the false assumption that 'nothing' is a noun?" Or does the trouble lie with the human trait that would attempt to exploit the lemmings' true quest for life?"

Lou Costello:  What are you asking me for?

Robin Goodfellow:  "If we shadows have offended think but this and...."

Abu: "I am Abu the thief. Son of Abu the thief. Grandson of Abu the thief."

Howard Hughes:  "Now regarding the Japanese Zero... The Japanese Zero was a shock..... "

Hamlet:  "To be, or not to be.  That is the question."

Erique Claudin:  "I'm famous..... just not too many people know it"

Hamlet:  "And therefore as a stranger give it welcome.  There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

Phil:  "What could be more demoralizing and depressing than to have your privacy invaded for your entire life or more by individuals with whom you would never choose to befriend, and who attempt to converse with you through the wall or by Woody Norris technology or other means, and who disturb your peace and prosperity and sense of well being?  Who destroy the value of your property.  Make it unsellable. Plant mickies to make it sellable.  I cannot think of anything.  It must be considered an act of war."

Ronald Reagan:  "Mr. Gorbachev, open this gate. Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!"

Irving Berlin:  "The world would not be in such a snarl, had Marx been Groucho instead of Karl."

Phil:  "I've been rich and I've been poor. Ritz is better, Puttin'."

Harpo: